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Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Our 12th Date-iversary

I cannot type this without feeling really old: TWELVE years ago today, Brian and I went on our first date. I recapped the evening (in its 12-hour entirety) back in 2009, so make sure to go read about it here.

I was reminiscing about the date recently and couldn't help but notice some of the parallels between that first date and how our marriage has panned out over the past 8 years:

1. It was expensive.
Brian very graciously bought us dinner, hot chocolate, and a visit to Santa's Wonderland. That makes for a pricey date for anyone, let alone a couple of jobless kids in college.

After owning two different homes and three different cars, enduring several years of fertility treatments, traveling, birthing/raising two toddlers, and living life in general, it's safe to say that date was a small glimpse of what expenses were to come. I'd like to think that Brian would say that the first date was worth every penny, as the rest of it has been, too :)

2. We laughed a lot.
We couldn't help but laugh at the fact that it took us 4 different attempts at restaurants before we found one without a 1+hour wait. And you better believe I was laughing when Brian suggested the guy looking for a seat at the coffee shop we visited was "checking me out" and jokingly threatened to stab him in the neck with his keys. I don't have a clue what we chatted about in his car until 6 am the next morning, but I'm sure we were laughing if for no other reason than that we were delirious.

If there's anything we've done consistently well throughout our marriage, it has been that we've always found a reason to laugh. When we've been fighting or just struggling to find common ground, one or the other has channeled an imaginary friend, turned on a ridiculous song, or found some other way to lighten the mood. This has proven effective so far and as a bonus, it's much cheaper than therapy!

3. It was tiring.
I always refer to our first date as a marathon because as I mentioned above, it lasted for 12 hours. This is impressive for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is my total inability (and lack of desire) to stay up late. I'm glad we stuck with it, though, because chatting into the wee hours of the morning and almost-holding-hands was a highlight of the date I don't want to forget.

Any of you that are married can attest to the fact that marriage is a marathon rather than a sprint. Sharing life with someone has been exhausting in the best way possible (especially in the first 2 months of the twins' lives...), and I'm thankful that by God's grace, we've endured.

4. We were afraid.
Yes, there were the normal first date fears - Will I say something stupid? Will he/she like me? Will anything come of this? But there was also literal fear when we made a detour and stopped at an abandoned house to creep around in the attic (interesting activity choice, Brian!). And of course the fear that my sorority house "mom" would catch us watching "Serendipity" in the TV room past curfew and get mad at me.

I don't think "fear" is an emotion I ever would have associated with marriage when I was younger, but it has certainly shown its face a few times since we were married. Fear that I wouldn't find a job. Fear that Brian wouldn't find a job. Fear that we'd never have children. Fear that we'd never survive having children. Fear that we'd never sell our house. I'm thankful that through the little fears and the big ones, we've been able to face them together.

5. It was special.
Though I can't tell you that either of us knew on that first date that the other was "the one," I can tell you that we both knew we were embarking on something special. I knew when Brian showed up to pick me up holding a poster with 10 reasons he liked me that it wasn't going to be a typical first date. And likewise, our marriage hasn't been 100% what either of us expected either. But I can safely say that both exceeded my expectations, and I have no doubt that that will continue to be the case as we keep doing life together.

So with that, happy 12-year date-iversary, Brian. Thank you for taking a chance and asking me out all those years ago and for still choosing to love me today. I love you!

(And thank you to everyone else for enduring the cheesiness of this post!)

A picture from our dating days

A picture from 2 weeks ago


the blogivers said...

For some reason 12 years doesn't sound like ENOUGH time to me - it feels like it happened way longer ago than that! I'm glad it worked out for you crazy kids, even if your first date was one of the weirdest ones ever!

Erika said...

Oh, I love this!! What great comparisons! Happy date-iversary!

Emily said...

Awww this is super cute! And wow, a 12-hour marathon date!

Brittany said...

Happy Date-iversary! :) I remember it like it was yesterday!

Brittnie said...

Can I just say I'm super impressed you remember the actual date of your first date because you know me . . . No clue! I'll have to ask B when he gets home... lol!!

Love all the comparisons! :-)

Allena said...

I went back and read about your 12 hour date - too fun! Brent and I didn't really have a first date, so sad. We started hanging out at each other's houses (high school, so we obviously lived at home, super HOT) and then I told him (on the phone mind you) that he was my boyfriend. Then about 6 weeks later we went to the movies - the first time we weren't at school or each other's houses, ha. So did you guys meet because y'all lived across the street? Would love to hear that story!

Natasha said...

I love how you've compared your first date to your marriage. Are you sure you aren't/weren't an English major?!? And now I'm off to read your first date post...

I don't remember my and Dave's first date. It might have been to a James Bond movie. Ha!