Well for those of you that have been wondering, we did successfully pick up our new Dyson last weekend, and we were delighted to find that it was, in fact, a vacuum and not a mattress. I would love to rave about how wonderful and life-changing it has been, but the sad fact is that I have not used it so far.
Brian, however, seemed to be pretty impressed, although not as impressed as I might have preferred considering its cost. But then again, I can understand why a vacuum wouldn’t send him shouting with glee from the rooftops… a new video game or the start of one of his imaginary sports drafts (he loves it when I call them that!) would be far more effective in accomplishing that.
He actually tried to give me a little tutorial on how to use the Dyson (because apparently my feeble female brain can’t figure out how to operate a vacuum without instruction :o), but I am pretty sure he interrupted my facebook-stalking at the time, so you can imagine how short my attention span was. All I remember is him saying something about a wand, at which point I started thinking about princesses and was too distracted to continue listening. Ok I’m kidding, I’m not 4 years old—I went back to thinking about facebook.
Anyway, about 10 minutes into his first go with the Dyson, I heard him turn it off and start groaning in agony. When I (after abandoning facebook for the 2nd time) ran to his rescue, I discovered that he had learned lesson number one with a bag-less vacuum: If you suck up a roach, it will smell like burning, rotting cockroach. Which, in case you have no brain, is disgusting. And all in one fell swoop, my dreams of owning a vacuum that was capable of eliminating my mortal enemy were crushed. Apparently we (Brian) will have to continue killing the roaches ourselves. Bummer.
And that’s really all I have to say today, so if you were expecting more dollar store ranting, I apologize for disappointing you.