I know I should have written about this sooner, but the Valentine’s Day weekend’s festivities distracted me, so forgive me for the delay.
Let me just be brief with you: when I was at work on Friday, my badge accidentally fell into the toilet (was “accidentally” really even necessary there?). And when faced with the possibility of having to pay $10 to replace that pesky badge, I did the unthinkable—I reached my hand into that VERY public toilet and rescued my badge from a burial at sea. To answer your question, NO, I had not used the toilet yet. But I think you'll agree that that doesn’t make it any less disgusting.
After calming my gag reflex and exclaiming “SICK! SICK! SICK!” over and over again, I exited the stall, went to the sink, and spent a good 10 minutes sterilizing my hand and my badge with soap and the hottest water that I could tolerate. They both may be clean, but they will never, ever be the same again.
Let me just say that I have seen the “clientele” that use that restroom, and I have on more than one occasion skipped over that exact stall because of its filth factor. And now I have to continue life knowing that I stuck my hand inside that toilet. My right hand at that. Vomit.
What I found most amusing was that, upon returning to my office and sharing the story with my horrified female co-workers, someone asked me, “Well did you wash it off?!” Nope, I decided to lick it clean. YES I washed it off, but that doesn’t mean the memory won’t scar me for many potty-trips to come.
And worst of all, when I was telling the story and revealed that my main motivation in fishing it out was to avoid paying for a replacement badge, I was informed that they don’t, in fact, charge for the replacement badge. Awesome.
Hope your Friday the 13th was a little less scary!
And have no fear, a Valentine’s Day re-cap will be coming your way shortly!