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Sunday, February 15, 2009

I don’t blame you if you never want to shake my hand again

I know I should have written about this sooner, but the Valentine’s Day weekend’s festivities distracted me, so forgive me for the delay.

Let me just be brief with you: when I was at work on Friday, my badge accidentally fell into the toilet (was “accidentally” really even necessary there?). And when faced with the possibility of having to pay $10 to replace that pesky badge, I did the unthinkable—I reached my hand into that VERY public toilet and rescued my badge from a burial at sea. To answer your question, NO, I had not used the toilet yet. But I think you'll agree that that doesn’t make it any less disgusting.

After calming my gag reflex and exclaiming “SICK! SICK! SICK!” over and over again, I exited the stall, went to the sink, and spent a good 10 minutes sterilizing my hand and my badge with soap and the hottest water that I could tolerate. They both may be clean, but they will never, ever be the same again.

Let me just say that I have seen the “clientele” that use that restroom, and I have on more than one occasion skipped over that exact stall because of its filth factor. And now I have to continue life knowing that I stuck my hand inside that toilet. My right hand at that. Vomit.

What I found most amusing was that, upon returning to my office and sharing the story with my horrified female co-workers, someone asked me, “Well did you wash it off?!” Nope, I decided to lick it clean. YES I washed it off, but that doesn’t mean the memory won’t scar me for many potty-trips to come.

And worst of all, when I was telling the story and revealed that my main motivation in fishing it out was to avoid paying for a replacement badge, I was informed that they don’t, in fact, charge for the replacement badge. Awesome.

Hope your Friday the 13th was a little less scary!

And have no fear, a Valentine’s Day re-cap will be coming your way shortly!

4 comments:

*Kimmie* said...

I don't recommend you see Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist... it has a similar incident repeated throughout the movie. EW.

Lorne said...

You should have flushed the toilet and then snatched the badge when there is very little water in the bowl.

... don't ask me how I know this very useful piece of information.

Beth said...

I feel ya... Sophomore year of high school I was wearing my friend's overalls (I swear it was cool, well maybe kind of) and one of the straps dropped in the toilet AS I WAS GETTING UP. So not cool. I'm with Kimmie. I wouldn't see Nick and Norah's movie either, but for multiple reasons.

Chrissy said...

We went to Benjy's for our Valentines date, too!! I was skeptical and pleasantly surprised as well. We got dessert to go from Ruggles.